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I seriously never do this, but you're really cute. Can I have your email?

Thanks babe! I'll shoot you a message later.



What happens when you mix spousal homicide with a rabid Danny DeVito? What happens when you discover a whole universe inside your dining room chair, or when the most powerful AI in existence uploads humanity to the cloud? 

Stop. I don't have time for all of your silly questions. You'll find out if you read the damn issue.


GOOEY is a rare publication that specializes in weird and funny fiction. Our directorial team is a small, eclectic group of aspiring writers, editors, and publishers who love strange and barbaric fiction. Our editorial team, however, is a much larger group who doesn’t understand, or care about, strange fiction at all. Fortunately, they have all signed blood oaths in exchange for various goods and services (mostly half-eaten sandwiches), which effectively transferred the rights to their souls in a standard copyright agreement, so they must do the directorial team’s bidding until the end of time. 

Specific images by Evan Shumka
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